Trust me, in my 25+ year career I’ve been called many things! Some positive, some maybe not so positive.
The fact is, people can – and will – say many things about you over your lifetime. So I’ve developed what I call my Wonder Woman shield, to guard against taking on a lot of the labels people call me.
I love this quote by the great actor Anthony Hopkins, who said: “My philosophy is: It’s none of my business what people say of me and think of me. I am what I am and I do what I do.” I reckon he’s spot on! You can’t control anyone but yourself, and how you react to a situation, so I’m sharing my Wonder Woman tips for you.
The Power of Words
Words do play a big role in our lives and I hate it when you get put in a box – and in a box that has a negative connotation around it like being “competitive” or being “ambitious”. Especially us women! Sometimes you’ve got to let words roll off you like water off a duck’s back. That said, I will always try to find a positive in something that I’m being labelled.
Someone calls me ambitious? I take that as them saying I’m dedicated, committed and a hard worker. And there’s definitely nothing negative about any of that! Labelled as competitive? Sure, I’ll take that too. Because competitive people are focussed and constantly challenging themselves, which I for one think are two pretty awesome qualities to have! So next time you get labelled, take a moment to think about what that person might really be saying.
What to do if You Get a Negative Label
If someone’s called you something and it’s come across negatively, there are two things to consider:
1: Are you being paranoid?
Think about it. Maybe you are being paranoid and it could be that you’re taking a label in the way in that it wasn’t intended. It could be that you’re extra sensitive to a certain label, because you’ve been called it before, or just because you downright don’t like it – and I don’t blame you! But often comments can be off the cuff and not meant to hold as much weight as you give them.
2: The person could be projecting
If that particular word or label is meant to be harmful, or if it was said in a negative way to try and hurt you, that to me is a total mirror. Which means it’s not you, it’s the person who is saying it that’s just talking about themselves. So let it glide right off your back, and don’t take the comment to heart.
On that note, sometimes people will never call you something you wish they would! For example, I will never be called “organised”! No one will ever call me that and I wish they would, but I applaud people and am in awe of people who are organised. I have so much respect for people who have everything down pat in terms of their Meal Plans and what they are doing for exercise. So while I may not be organised, I focus on all the other positive things people call me.
So there it is – my Wonder Woman deflection shield how I protect myself from negative connotations around labelling. Create your own Wonder Woman (or Man) guard so you’ll be ready the next time someone labels you. Have you ever been labelled something that you didn’t expect, or perhaps made you think twice? I’d love to know. Share below!
while there talking about me there leaving someone else alone
Thanks Michelle , Your talk on empower in 2015, WOW thank you so much, for reminding me how balls I can be. I must say this was a very powerful message. I am a planner as well, I hit those walls all the time, but some how I power threw them. Look forward to seeing many more of your talks. Your a very powerful roll model and speaker.
Once again, I have reflected on this video. Regarding what people think and their personal opinions, it’s a reflection of themselves. Yes, family can be the most brutal. The healthier I get the more I see how ill certain individuals are in my life, and I was following right behind them at one time.
It is very hard when you know you are doing what you feel is kind and thoughtful and other see it as something else. Family are the worse.
Thanks Mish good advise, I look at you as totally organized after doing my 1st round of 12wbt I was amazed at how organized you were to have entire team of organizers. Your program Is brilliant sadly there are still so many eating themselves to death.
Mish, Well done! You have hit the nail on the head. People with negative comments should really look at themselves!!
Cheers well said and done.
I am working on your comments Mish …not so much weight lost this round but certainly I am taking in your video contents and working on food intake …making LOTS of changes. I reckon it’s 65 years of habits that I’m working on and according to your helpful comments on things like ‘make a decision’ etc things are going to turn around. I haven’t been able to work on increasing my exercise enough yet …more to change in my head no doubt. At the very least my waist seems to be shrinking ….Thanks …Jenny
I absolutely love this one!! Out of all your videos this is one of my favourites. I was raised in foster care and was passed from home to home. I tended to take on a lot of crap that people would say. I now just learned how to “break up” with my past and move on to my tomorrow. Like a bad boyfriend that keeps lingering, was like my past! lol It feels good to reject negative for a change and dump it! Thank you
It is hard some times people say some really hurtful and stupid things , Then your left with feeling hurt & some people can not shake it it’s just like the water keeps rolling and rolling down that ducks back . This advice is great and it is broken down on how to deal with it thank you I’ll be thinking about it and applying a lot more now . 🙂
You’re an inspiration to women in Australia… a great health and fitness role model, with clearly a heart that’s passionate about the well being of others! Keep doing what you’re doing as it’s fantastic!
Great article Mish, you are such an inspiration.
As a 49 year old mature woman it is really important for me to see role models that emulate positivity, femininity, strength, self-awareness, confidence and success. Michelle, you are a rare role model portraying possibility and the importance of being true to yourself – this is something we need to see more of.
Thanks Michelle -as always sensible down to earth wise words. You are a wonderful role model to us all. More power to you !
Yes Mishy! You are the perfect Wonder Woman! I love the mirror. It is hard when someone catches you off guard because the hurt is so painful. If you realise that you can only control yourself and not others, it is so empowering and all of a sudden the people around you, (who usually think they can control you) they seem to become not as threatening. And if they are, you can see right through the. Good on you Mish, keep up the positivity! Baby Mishanddo will be a force to be reckoned with! X
Wow, this certainly came at just the right time for me. You are a mind reader, Michelle! A very good and long time friend has recently started being negative towards me, saying I’m bossy and also questioning some things I say as if I am exaggerating. This has hurt and depressed me this week. I had areal crisis of confidence. So my Wonder Woman Defence is that 1. I like to find solutions and make things easier for others and that’s a good thing and 2. maybe I am being paranoid and she is just clarifying information and helping me to see the true situation. Xx
This is exactly how I feel about other people’s negativity.
Brilliant – you are beautiful, strong and an inspiration and that is through the power of positive – keep it going:).
Well said Mish. “What other people think of me is none of my business” is my mantra! An old boss taught me this when I was 22. It took me a very long time to understand what this meant and live it. Once you realise this, life becomes so much easier and no ones words have power over you. I just wish we could teach our kids and teens this, so faceless bullying on Facebook doesn’t end up taking lives.